The #ownvoice movement has me thinking about the voices of my male characters. Now, I understand this type of consideration is not necessarily the focus of the #ownvoice movement. It’s more like a side benefit, but anything that helps to improve the authenticity in our stories is a good thing.
I have several guys I check in with to help me create realistic dialogue and interior thoughts. One of them is my real life romantic hero. He offers pretty good insight, but the other day I realized that as a romance writer, I can’t always utilize his most authentic advice. The conversation revolved around the color of my heroine’s lip gloss. I asked him if he would use the word coral or peach. He looked at me like I’d lost my mind. HIM: Coral? You mean like blue? ME: Blue? Coral is not blue. It’s like a peachy melon. HIM: No it isn’t. Isn’t coral that stuff that grows in the ocean? ME: Well, yes. But even that isn’t blue. It’s more like chalky white. HIM: Okay, why would anyone wear chalky white lip gloss. Then I looked like him like he’d lost his mind. HIM: No man would ever use the word coral or peach. We don’t notice stuff like that. ME: You don’t notice when a woman wears lip gloss We’ve been applying it for years just so we can be alluring and you guys don’t even notice? HIM: We notice that sometimes your lips look slimy or kind of sticky. ME: You mean glossy. HIM: Sure. And sometimes they have that glitter crap on them. ME: You mean sparkle gloss? HIM. Sure. ME: So, how am I supposed to describe her lips from my hero’s point of view? HIM: I don’t know. That she has them. Thanks, babe, for the male insight. I went back to the keyboard and revised my scene. The ex-boyfriend takes inventory of the ex-girlfriend whom he hasn’t seen for years. The first draft read like this: She rolled her shoulders back and held her head high. Her cocoa colored eyes tried hard to be emotionless. Her skin blushed pink. She’d be bright red later. No doubt she’d forgotten sunscreen, too. As always, her soft lips were just the right shade of glossy peach. The revised draft read like this: She sat, waiting for him at their old favorite table. Her hair was a windblown mess. Her skin was a painful, sunburned red and her lips--well, she still had them. I gave up and texted a picture of my heroine to my young adult son. Maybe it was a generational problem that kept my real life romantic hero from noticing things like lip color. Describe this girl, I asked my son. Immediately, he texted back: She has brown hair. I realize writers strive for authenticity, but I’m just not sure we can use this kind of realistic manly observation. Sorry guys, I’m gonna stick with what I hope men are thinking. That’s my version of romance writer #ownvoice. The philosophy helped me nab my real life romantic hero. I hope it will help me nab some readers, too.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorDee Linn loves words. When she was in the third grade, her exasperated teacher told her she'd probably talk to a pole, if she happen to be sitting beside it. Not much has changed except that now she says it in writing. She is a single mom of four, a teacher of teens, a cheater at board games, and a lover of life. She's a Kansas girl, but travels to all kinds of places in her head with characters living there, some of which she's sure she's created. Some, she's not sure how they got there. But they are way more interesting to talk to than a pole. Archives
November 2017
Categories
|