The other day a friend gave me some stellar advice.
I texted that I wanted to curl up in a corner and cry because there is too much "do" on my "to-do" list and not enough minutes in the day. Or the week. Maybe even the month. I do this to myself all the time. I look around and see everyone else juggling 500 to-dos while I'm spastically flailing, trying to keep something in the air without do-dropping everything. How does everyone else do it? Are they faking it? Surely, they are faking it. So I try to fake it. Then I consider faking a heart attack or having a real one just to escape the onslaught of 140 student essays coming my way and weeks of lesson plans and cross country meets and soccer games and theatre productions and birthdays and holidays and everything else that happens in my life in the Fall. This Fall in pariticular, I've added a complete novel rewrite and paranormal investigation outings (research for the next one) to the mix. I'm not sure it helps me that while I'm procrastinating, I read stories of the 84 year old nun who runs Iron Man triatholan or the young teen who is on the speaking circuit for starting her own environmentally friendly business. Or that I watch stories of Average Joes who build obstacle courses in their living rooms so they can train for 10 hours a day on top of being a parent and working 40 plus hours a week just so they can compete in American Ninja Warrior. I mean, where do these people find the time and the energy? Do they ever do laundry or go to the grocery store? Do their kids ever ask for 3 dozen homemade cookies at 10:00 the night before the school bake sale? Do their cars ever break down at the most inconvenient times? Do they ever read stories of the amazing accomplishments of others while procrastinating because of the paralyzing fear that if they gave it 100%, it would still never get done and then they would feel even more like a failure? Or am I the only one? I've read the books on believing in yourself. I've done the journaling and the meditating and the affirmations. It's all good. It all works. Still, there are moments when I know it's all gonna come crashing down because I physcially, emotionally, and mentally don't have what it takes to hold it all up. My friend's advice is simple and maybe worth more than all the money I've spent on all those journals and believe-in-yourself books. Here it is: Make a choice of what is most important to you and run with it. The rest will fall into place where it belongs. I know. It's not rocket science, is it? Nevertheless, I'm having signs made and posting it everywhere. He didn't say to prioritize. I already know that. He didn't say to let go of what I can't control. I know that, too. He said to make a decision for me and have faith that what is supposed to happen still will. These words revealed something else, too. They showed me how much anxiety I carry over the guilt of not placing someone else's priorities higher than mine. But I can't run and juggle at the same time. I've made my choice. I'm running with it. Now, if only I can avoid a broken shoelace, a mud puddle, the detour sign, rocky terrain, and all that other stuff that might stop me. Even if I can't avoid obstacles, I supposed overcoming it all will be easier without 500 balls in the air.
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Atrophy by Jess Anastasi, on sale for just 99¢!
About the Book: Twelve years on the prison planet Erebus makes a man long for death. The worst part for Tannin Everette is that he was framed for murder. He’s innocent. When the ship Imojenna lands for emergency repairs, Tannin risks everything to escape…only to find himself face to face with the captain’s undeniably gorgeous sister. Zahli Sherron isn’t planning on turning Tannin in. In fact, she actually believes him. Sure, he’s sexy as every kind of sin, but he’s no criminal—so she hides him. But no one escapes from Erebus and lives to tell about it. With every day that passes, Zahli further risks the lives of the entire crew…even as she falls in love with a man she can never have for herself. Find it online: Amazon | B&N | iTunes | Goodreads Author Info: Website | Twitter | Facebook | Goodreads | Newsletter Angeli by Jody Wallace, on sale for just 99¢! About the Book: He’s no angel… Gregori’s last mission is to protect Earth from the demons threatening to take control. He doesn’t care if he survives as long as he averts the impending apocalypse—until he meets Adelita, a human refugee, whose spirit and determination give him a renewed reason to fight. And live. He’s falling for her, despite the fact he’s told her nothing but lies and there can’t possibly be a future for them. Adelita can hardly believe the archangel Gregori, sent to defend mankind, has lost his faith and his edge. After he rescues her from a demon attack, she vows to help him recover both by any means necessary. But can she keep her own faith when she learns the truth about who and what Gregori really is? Find it online: Amazon | B&N | iTunes | Goodreads Author Info: Website | Twitter | Facebook | Goodreads | Newsletter The Descartes Legacy by Nina Croft About the Book: Her truth is more deadly than his revenge… Lucas Grafton has spent the last ten years hunting the Conclave, a secret organization that took everything from him: his wife, his child, his very identity. Now he has a lead—an imminent terrorist attack on London, code-named Descartes. Born with a genetic illness, Jenna Young has always known she was different. But the unexpected death of her father catapults her into a world she never expected. In order to stay alive, she must solve a twenty-five year old mystery. Her only ally is a hard, bitter man in search of retribution, her only clue the Descartes Highlands, an area on the near side of the moon. Luke’s need for revenge collides with Jenna’s hunt for the past, and together they must stand against the Conclave. They must do this while uncovering the truth behind Jenna’s illness, a truth that will make Jenna question her humanity. Find it online: Amazon | B&N | iTunes | Goodreads Author Info: Website | Twitter | Facebook | Goodreads | Newsletter Moonlight by Lisa Kessler About the Book: Embrace your destiny… Rancher Adam Sloan is more than meets the eye. As the heir to his Pack, the sexy werewolf’s biggest challenge is keeping his kin’s true nature under wraps. But a group of jaguar shifters threatens to reveal the pack, blasting into town killing humans in plain sight. And when he smells one at the local diner, his standing orders are to take her out. Lana Turpin doesn’t realize she’s a moving target. Raised in the foster system, she only knows that she blacks out during the new moon and wakes up without remembering a thing. But now she’s being tracked by some strange organization that wants her back–even though she’s never stepped foot inside their compound. And the stranger across the diner is watching her like an enemy. It should be a simple mission for Adam, but when he touches the frustratingly beautiful Lana, his inner wolf howls…mate. Now, the two must find and stop the people who hunt her…and Adam must keep his own family from killing the only woman he will ever love. Find it online: Amazon | B&N | iTunes | Goodreads Author Info: Website | Twitter | Facebook | Goodreads | Newsletter Giveaway: Link: http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/1cb55495885/? We are one week in, and I am already blown away. I'm a teacher. This year, for the first time, I am teaching a creative writing class. There is no text book, no sylabus, no guidelines. I'm starting from scratch. I figured my first challenge would be to find a way for my students to simply get something on paper. Anything on paper. I was wrong. The dove right in. On the very first day, I assured the students that everyone has a story. I wasn't sure if I believed it myself, but I wanted them to believe it. They did. In fact, they convinced me. Already. And we are only one week in. Each teenager captured a story and poured it out on the paper along with little pieces of their souls. Beautiful. This class landed in my lap because I was the only one on staff who wanted to teach it. (Well, that and the fact that I begged for it.) Other teachers commented on how they can't stand teaching creative writing because they have to wade through so many bad stories. We are one week in. So far, no one has written a bad story. I've seen plenty of grammar errors and comma splices and uncapitalized names, but not one bad story. What I've seen instead is natural comedic timing, raw emotion, real tears, and full characters. It scares me and here's why. We have yet to actually talk about how to write a story. They don't really know what they are doing. They are just writing. Believe me, I'm not claiming to have a classroom full of natural-born Hemmingways. There is a lot of work to be done. What I am saying is that these kids, when left to imagine and create, come up with real, raw stuff. I'm afraid of what will happen when we start applying the confines of proper exposition and character arc and dialogue tags and all that. I'm terrified that I'll douse their passions and silence their voices. We are one week in and I've already learned that real and raw is better than formulaic and contrived. That, when it comes to writing, following your heart beats following the rules. That when you try to hard to sound like a writer, you aren't really writing at all. You are just trying to sound like one. It seems the first lesson was for me. It also seems that I've got a lot to learn. I gave up writing. Several years ago, after taking a novel writing class and joining a local writers group and attending a few RWA conventions and receiving a few rejection letters on full manuscripts, I gave up writing. It wasn't the rejection letters that did it. My quitting was a result of a combination of impatience at the slow process and frustration at not knowing how to go from pretty good to published. When I say I gave up writing, I don't mean that I stopped writing. If you're a writer, you know the impossibility of that concept. I just gave up the idea of ever publishing a novel. I wrote articles for a local newspaper and an online business magazine. Okay, so I also secretly continued creating novel-type manuscripts, but pretended I wasn't actually writing them with the intent to publish. A few years ago, I tiptoed back into the fray. What a difference a few years makes! Writing stuff is everywhere! My prior experiences had left me believing that there were few spaces open for pre-published writers to become published authors. Even when I felt close, I still felt too far away with no sense of direction or road map. While I was away, the internet happened. I mean really happened. As a mother and teacher of teens, I'm not always a fan of social media, but as a writer...Holy Wordsmiths! Pre-published writers, post-published authors, agents, editors, interns, and writing coaches are suddenly accessible. You know what else? They aren't all superstars with secret handshakes and code words to a club I'll never belong to. They are kind and encouraging and empathetic and brilliant and generous. Not only is writing stuff everywhere, so is writer love. I witnessed this with Brenda Drake and her service to the writing industry. (Check out her website here.) I jumped into her #PitMad event and got a full request. In preparing for her Pitch Wars, I've connected with dozens of beautiful writer souls. Even if I'm not matched with a mentor, I'm already winning. I've also convinced a couple of writer friends to jump in, too. So much love! Pursuing publication is definitely sweeter the second time around--with one exception. When I see all the pre-published who became post-published during my sabbatical, I want to rewind life and never give up the first time. I'm a lover, not a fighter, but I'm reading to go to battle for #PitchWars!
The manuscript I'm submitting is a contemporary romance. You might have noticed #amwritingYA on my Twitter feed, @Roaringmoms. It's not a lie. I am currently working on a YA, but it's not submission ready. I'm excited to get to a work with a mentor who can help me get my contemporary romance published. I have some amazing critique partners. One is a USA Today best selling author. I learn a lot from them; however, I need some new eyes on this story. Five reasons why you want to mentor me: 5. Now is the time. I believe that timing is everything. Well, timing is important, anyway. I've recently returned to focusing on my passion--writing. Now that my four kids are grown and going for their dreams, it's mama's turn. Plus, I promised myself I'd be published by a certain age. It's looming. Now is the time. 4. Ashley and Eric need you. My main characters are screaming at me to get them published. They suffered and celebrated with me through edits and rewrites and tweaks and polishes and several full requests. They deserve to be taken to the next level, and I need you to guide us. 3. Proven Work Ethic. At one point in my life, I had four children under the age of seven. They turned into three teens and a preteen. I thought the fact that I chose natural childbirth each time would prepare for me for the eventual parenting three teens and a preteen. The wine helped. (So did writing my parenting blog www.roaringmoms.blogspot.com for family and friends. Check it out, too.) Then there's the time I earned a Master's Degree in English while chasing a three-year-old, while enduring pregnancy, and jumping through state government hoops to obtain licensing for my now ex-husband's adoption agency. Afterwards, I opened the international division--out of the goodness of my heart. As a single mom, I've worked 14 hour days at jobs I hated, but I had three teens and a preteen and a house payment. In fact, I don't know what it is to not work hard. I'm excited to work hard to realize my dream. (Did I mention now is the time?) 2. Must Write Faster. The nagging voices of several plotted-out stories grow louder everyday. Although I'm always working to improve my craft, I know that working with a mentor will expedite the progress. I would be honored to have you share your wisdom, your tips, your critique, your experience. I'm hoping to find someone who can help me get more right the first time through, so the rewrites and edits go faster. 1. Cat Lady Life Risk. The other day after a grocery run where I purchased kitty litter, two boxes of Little Debbie snack cakes, and a romance novel, I stopped by the wine store. I picked up a bottle of my latest favorite, 19 Crimes, and waited to pay. I noticed the hot, male cashier kept staring at my boobs. I wore jeans and a plain black tank. I wasn't trying to be sexy, but hey. Anyway, I flirty-grinned and might have even batted an eyelash or two. I paid and went back to my car where, of course, I adjusted my rear view mirror, so I could see what he saw. I didn't remember putting on my good bra that morning, but I also didn't remember what I had for breakfast. So, yes, I checked out my own rack. He'd been looking at it, alright. Because it was covered with cat hair from the hug I gave Fred "Binx" Weasley before the grocery run. I believe with my whole cat-hair-covered heart that the life of an accidental Cat Lady is exponentially improved with the publishing of her books. Help me, please. Do you need noise?
I do.I only recently discovered this need for noise, or at least for the right kind of noise. As a high school teacher and a mom of four, I guess I've acclimated to working with noise. (Check out my Roaringmoms Blog post from February of this year.) Today the need is most crucially felt. I sit down to move forward on The Prom List. Those imaginary teens living in my head are more persistent than the real ones I live with. The only way to shut them up is to write it down, right? My biological teens are not home. The day is young, so I get the tea and clear a spot on the desk, settle into my big comfy chair and-- Fred Binx coughs up a hairball. For ten minutes. Then the overhead banging starts. (I'm still trying to convince my kids that our upstairs neighbors are avid exercises, but I assure you, banging is the correct term here.) Next comes the ticking. I've lived with that wall clock for six months now. Was it always so loud? Every second ticking away like an irritating reminder that my life is, too, while the page is still blank. I need cover up noise. Music won't work because I will sing along. I can't sing along and write at the same time. At some point, the brain synapses would cross, and my angsty characters would start belting Bon Jovi. Not a good fit. Television. That's it. My television is in the living room, down the short hall from my office. The noise will float in, but I won't be distracted by the screen. Perfect There's just one problem. Just Like Heaven is on. Now, I realize there are dozens of other channels, but come on! It's Mark Ruffalo and Reese Witherspoon. Just Like Heaven is one of the best overlooked, underappreciated romantic comedies of all time. I can't just keep flipping channels past Mark Ruffalo and Reese Witherspoon. What self-respecting romance authors does that? Besides, what better cover up noise than one of my favorite funny love stories? I mean, I am composing funny love stories. It's gotta be fate, right? Just Like Heaven plays in the background. I heat up the tea. I check on the cat and clean up the barf, wash my hands and... "The power of Christ compels you. The power of Christ compels you." I run back to the living room. Father Flannigan missing Reese with his holy water in an attempt to exorcise her is one of the best scenes. It's followed by the wanna-be ghost busters and "Napoleon Dynamite" channeling her spirit. And I'm done. I give in. I sit down and watch one of the best overlooked, under appreciated romantic comedies of all time. Sigh. What else am I gonna do? Yes, I'm a prepublished romance writer, but I'm a hopeless romantic first. So it's an hour later and I haven't fulfilled my noise need. My tea cup is empty. My angsty characters are in panic mode. And my page is still blank. At least the banging has stopped--for now. Maybe I'll hire someone to kick a soccer ball against the wall or bicker with his sister in the kitchen. My empty-nester writer friends often wonder how we single moms get any writing done at all. I now have an answer for them. It's all the noise. |
AuthorDee Linn loves words. When she was in the third grade, her exasperated teacher told her she'd probably talk to a pole, if she happen to be sitting beside it. Not much has changed except that now she says it in writing. She is a single mom of four, a teacher of teens, a cheater at board games, and a lover of life. She's a Kansas girl, but travels to all kinds of places in her head with characters living there, some of which she's sure she's created. Some, she's not sure how they got there. But they are way more interesting to talk to than a pole. Archives
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